MARY'S BIG SISTER

MARY’S BIG SISTER

In 1985, Beloved and I attended a conference in Las Vegas. For the previous two years I had been engaged in ferreting out what information that I could obtain on my mother’s (biological) family.

I had learned that my grandmother Annie Lois’s youngest sister was living in Fresno California. The conference wrapped up a day and a half early and a light bulb went off over my head.

Now, let me say, I have strengths and weaknesses like anyone else. Spatial relationships are not my strength.

When I proposed to Beloved that since we were “practically in the neighborhood”,  that we should drive over to Fresno to meet my great aunt, I reasoned that “Nevada is pretty close to California”—on the map. Well, it is!  Relatively speaking-- I mean, Gulf Coast to California vs. Nevada to California—you see my point.

We rented a car and started out toward Fresno from Las Vegas. Beloved likes to drive and I like to let him, so this works well for us.  I slept a lot; but every time the engine revved and sounded like it was struggling the change in the engine sound disturbed me briefly. 

You see, the map I had glanced at casually was not a topographical map. I had overlooked a tiny little obstacle between those two western states: the Rocky Mountains.

The trip was actually hundreds of miles. I saw little of the countryside, though I do remember one spectacular sunrise in the mountains.  The sky was deeply and richly colorful—gold and red-- much more vivid than the pastels that are more familiar to me. The mountains on the horizon shifted from blues and purples as the shadows changed.

Aunt Mary was a delightful sprite. She invited the relatives within driving distance (within the city or county around Fresno) to come over to meet us. For those living in Los Angeles, it was too far a drive. J

She made lunch for us and we looked at the few photographs that she had. She did not have one of my grandmother, Annie Lois, but she shared her memories with me. 

She knew of Annie Lois’ attempt to lure Bernice and Clara to run away from their adopted parents. Mary said Annie Lois had always regretted not (being able) to raise her children. Aunt Mary wanted me to know that Annie Lois' children were loved and remembered,though.

Annie Lois moved around settling finally in Eudora Arkansas.  There were long periods of time when she functioned well; she was talented with needlepoint and crochet. There were other times when she was deeply depressed, neglected herself, and was in need of family to take care of her.

During a family holiday dinner in the fall –winter one year when she was barely in her sixties, Annie Lois died suddenly. Heart attack probably, Mary opined.

While these were tidbits, really, each part helped to draw a portrait of Annie Lois—a troubled talented woman who loved her children. She had been Mary’s big sister, and obviously, Mary loved her.